Sharifa, I loved your words this morning. It makes me grin, thinking of Jonathan's greeting. He has a marvelous smile (and for readers not familiar, Jonathan is my dear cousin, so I am allowed to say that).

I am married to tender man. After nearly 11 years of marriage, I am finally realizing what that means. I am a little slow. You see, tenderness may have been a "nice to have", something that I said I wanted when it showed itself in ways that I could relate to, like thoughtful gifts, impromptu affection etc.. The true tender man, however, has a deeper more profound side to him. It's this deeper side of tenderness, that I find myself trampling on in my haste to be the woman people expect me to be.

After more than a decade of marriage, it's easy to step all over the tenderness that drew you to someone. It's becomes easier to leave THEIR laundry in baskets to put away or to prefer sleep over affection. It's shockingly simple to go days without checking in on their spirit. Then, you add two little bodies that require constant vigilence and affection and a man's tenderness can almost seem, inconvenient. I just assume so much.

It is the greatest gift a man can give a woman, for tenderness leads to humility, passion, discipline and even gentle humor! I have challenged myself to be a better steward of that gift. With each passing year of marriage, I want to love him more - even those needs that his tenderness creates within him. I need to tell the world and it's insane demands to "hush, right now I am tending to a precious man!"