My “Ode to Joy”

The words are still ringing in my ear as I helped her clear her beautiful dishes from the table during one of her carefully executed dinners. Privately, in the kitchen, she winked at me and said in her distinctively southern accent, “you know, never stack the plates at the table – it just gets both sides dirty.” There you have it. She lived almost poised in an earlier era and carried it out with such authenticity that it made you wish you could stay at her table forever.

The words are still ringing in my ear as I helped her clear her beautiful dishes from the table during one of her carefully executed dinners. Privately, in the kitchen, she winked at me and said in her distinctively southern accent, “you know, never stack the plates at the table – it just gets both sides dirty.” There you have it. She lived almost poised in an earlier era and carried it out with such authenticity that it made you wish you could stay at her table forever.

If Beethoven were composing Ode to Joy today she could be his inspiration. She fits. The exercise of writing and posting this validates publically what my friend may never get to hear. This is my “Ode to Joy” in deep appreciation and honor of her life and the place she, Joy, has in my story.

This lovely, hospitable, southern lady and her husband welcomed us in, not only to the church my young  husband had come to pastor, but also into their lives and hearts. She became one who spurred me on. I’m not sure how my forming would have been if God had not intersected my life with hers.

For sure, it would have lacked seeing a vibrant infusion of beauty into all she did and a model of serving others in a lovely manner. Her way of living and serving gave me permission to cultivate the creativity within and to express it. She was an encourager- my encourager.

I wrote this response to her daughter in an email this week as she told me of Joy’s 80th birthday -without her beloved husband of a lifetime. How many dinner parties had he helped her host?

 “Her 80th, Wow! What a milestone.

 I love her as well. I can’t tell you what she means to me, to us and to our children as they were growing up.  We used to celebrate our daughter’s birthday with a dinner at our house with your mom and dad. I think your dad’s birthday was around the same time in April. One time they brought Shannon a lovely, fresh nosegay. Another time, Joy arrived with Bunny cupcakes when we had a party for our new rabbit “Patches”.

 She has been a gift from God to me. I will never forget her place in my life and just wish she really knew how much I love and value her. Maybe in some way she does. I pray that God’s presence will be a strong awareness for her as she continues to live as she is.“

Even though her memory now is severely impaired she lives Proverbs 15, “A joyful heart makes a cheerful countenance and a cheerful heart has a continual feast.” Oscar Wilde said, “Some people cause happiness wherever they go,” and they do and it is real. I am impacted by someone like this – my friend Joy.