• Engage

    What CAN I Do?

    Many of us have experienced seasons of illness and injury––either our own or someone we love. Often these excruciating times of pain, fear, and doubt engulf us like a suffocating suffering. We wake up every morning in painful uncertainty and lay down each night in the same state. Daily we withstand a raging storm––everything circles around but nothing is clear. Movement requires pushing against unyielding barriers. We want to hope for complete healing. We want to throw off the heavy chains encasing us. We want to be released from physical and emotional burdens so we can regain strength and enjoy life again. But sometimes the hope we cling to feels…

  • Engage

    Take Your Theology to the Doctor’s Office

    Two weeks after a head-on collision, the physical therapist for my friend Gina breezed into the hospital room, woke her abruptly, and declared, “The doctor wants you to take a few steps today.” Gina gazed at me as if to plead, “Don’t let her do this to me.” We were both appalled at the suggestion. Gina couldn’t even sit up in a wheelchair without passing out from the pain. The driver who caused the wreck had died instantly; doctors had pierced Gina’s skin with four pins to set the compound fracture in her leg. “Don’t question her doctor’s judgment,” I told myself. “Surely he knows what he’s doing.” I clamped…

  • someone grieving

    What Not To Say When Someone is Grieving

    Last week my dear friend Sandi Glahn wrote another boffo blog post about the myths of infertility, which included some of the dumb things people say. It may be insensitivity or a lack of education that spurs people to say things that are unhelpful at the least and downright hurtful much of the time. I still remember my own daggers to the heart after our first baby died nine days after her birth. And for the past several years, I have been collecting actual quotes said to those already in pain. So here’s my current list of What Not To Say when someone is hurting: Don’t start any sentence with…