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The Tapeworm Gallery: The Pregnant Pause
WOMAN SEEKING WOMEN 44yo freak with no kids seeks intrusive adult females for unsolicited fertility counsel ambush at next baby shower. No experience necessary. Accosts in room corners encouraged. Know-It-Alls welcome for prophecies, judgments, original advice, and magical remedies. Leave your Bible at home and we’ll talk some voodoo. Scab picker, salt, and $0.02 required. Come hungry. Alkaline water and Apricot Oyster Patties will be served. First 100 ladies will receive free PermaBond Lip Adhesive. *** Why does she respond to your opinionated opinions with a blank stare? Why won't she open up? You're just trying to help. Well, don't fret. I have the remedy. Like nails on the chalkboard,…
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The Tapeworm Gallery: Unequally Yoked
What's this I hear? Grace—dating one of them? I bet that got your panties in a wad. And it all started on the MLK holiday when he ran into her at the mall? You don't say. Why does the school even observe the MLK holiday? There are at most ten of them in the whole school. Anyway, you've got to put a stop to this before her father finds out. Lucky for her, her grandfather lies six feet under. Hope he doesn't jump forth from his grave. At least it's not one of those. With those winning the Miss America…
