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    The Tapeworm Gallery: Unequally Yoked

              What's this I hear? Grace—dating one of them? I bet that got your panties in a wad. And it all started on the MLK holiday when he ran into her at the mall? You don't say. Why does the school even observe the MLK holiday? There are at most ten of them in the whole school.             Anyway, you've got to put a stop to this before her father finds out. Lucky for her, her grandfather lies six feet under. Hope he doesn't jump forth from his grave.           At least it's not one of those.              With those winning the Miss America…

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    The Tapeworm Gallery: Something New Under the Sun

                December 31 has arrived, though not soon enough. You've counted down the days for Crabatha's departure. I succeeded in keeping you perpetually irritated with her (and Mark) these past nine weeks. I know you will miss her lemon face and nails-on-chalkboard nagging. But no worries. I have someone else in the cue to prick your sensitivities. So keep forgetting Jesus, and keep focusing on your rights.              Speaking of rights, I saw your list—your 2016 Happiness Umbrella of Needs, Goals, Entitlements, and Resolutions. Adorable. I see you want to stop living in the past. Great idea. I prefer you keep your eyes on the…