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There Is Maturity in Moderation
“I’ll just have one,” I reasoned, as I reached for the mini chocolates. But it disappeared so quickly and felt so satisfying, I took another. And another. Proverbs aptly describes how I felt after my indulgence. “You have found honey—eat only what is sufficient for you, lest you become stuffed with it and vomit it up” (Proverbs 25:16). Well, that might be an exaggeration, but you get the point. Why can’t I stop with one? The alternative seems to be to deny myself totally, to abstain completely. Perhaps it’s better to not have any sweets at all. That works for me at home. I don’t regularly keep sweets lying around.…
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Hearing Well and Being Heard Well
Everyone wants to be heard well, but are we as willing to hear others well? In order to understand ourselves and others, different ways to categorize people have emerged over the years such as Myers & Briggs, DISC, and Enneagram. I recently read about another way to categorize people in a book dealing with how we communicate, 5 Voices: How to Communicate Effectively with Everyone You Lead.[1] The book describes 5 different voices with which people communicate—the Pioneer, Creative, Connector, Guardian, and Nurturer. Each voice (think communication style when I use the word voice) has positive inclinations and negative tendencies. In analyzing the book through a biblical worldview, I discovered…
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Short-Term What, Long-Term What? Choose Well.
Of all the wisdom and insight I learned in a three-year lay counseling training, one really stands out. I think of this little chart as “the doghouse.” Decision-making often involves choosing between short-term pleasure or short-term pain. (Usually it’s more like short-term inconvenience.) Short-term pleasure often leads to long-term pain, and short-term pain often leads to long-term pleasure. What doesn’t work, and is a horribly unrealistic expectation for life, is short-term pleasure leading to long-term pleasure! (Wouldn’t THAT be nice?!) Maturity and wisdom is displayed by the choices we make, especially when we exercise patience and self-control, not insisting on the instant-gratification jolt of “I want it NOW!!!” Many of…
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The Tyranny of the Expected Response… What lies beneath?
A farmer sits on his front porch. Just inside the screen door the phone rings. And rings. His neighbor asks, “Aren’t you going to get that?” The farmer spits and leans back, “I bought that phone for my convenience. And right now…it’s not convenient.” Not so long ago…if someone phoned you and you didn’t answer…they just called you back. Then, If someone emailed you…you responded within a day or two. All was well. Then came instant messenger and Facebook messaging. We see you are logged in on Facebook so we kind of expect you to respond… Then came a river of tweets rushing by…I know you’re always checking…
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The Dark Side of Creativity: Procrastination
Is your brain like a German autobahn with lots of slick, European sports-car thoughts…zooming in out of nowhere…inspiring…creating…(distracting)? Creativity is a joy to give away–writing, cooking, festive table settings, gardening, crafts, ministry projects, lesson preps—all these rich gifts God has given us. But there’s a downside too. Research links creativity to impulsivity. James 1:14-15 for Creatives might read, “…each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own impulses. Then impulsivity when it has conceived gives birth to loss of self-control, and loss of self-control, when it is fully grown brings forth procrastination, missed deadlines and unfinished work.” And the guilty, diminished feeling that goes with them.…
