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Want to Destroy Your Family? Be a Perfectionist
This week I'm happy to have as my guest Dani Ross. She's a wife and a mother of three young boys living in Flower Mound, Texas, pursuing a double masters degree at Dallas Theological Seminary in Christian Leadership and Systematic Theology: I began my journey as a mom like most, staring into my baby’s expectant eyes with great anticipation for a sweet, sweet life to come. I was ready to tackle the wild, unknown world of parenting in a life I had preplanned. Expertly researched. The years of comparison with those who had come before me provided me with a nice tidy list of “I’ll nevers” kept in my back pocket.…
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Staying Home with Kids vs. Second Income
Not long ago, the Desiring God site ran an article titled, “Does My Family Need a Second Income?” The article began like this: “‘Will you stay home?’ This is the question I ask when I meet a postpartum mom wearing her weeks-old baby in a Moby Wrap or Ergobaby carrier. Whether the answer is yes or no, I’m glad for every opportunity to talk with new moms about what it will cost them to return to the workplace.” The article went on to talk about why women should stay at home with their kids. Some of the author’s arguments are worth exploring, because Christian parents have this in common: we want the best for…
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The 3rd Grade Transgender Bus Driver
This blog post originally ran on August 19, 2009. It’s back to school time, which usually means parents buy school supplies and start waking kids up earlier in the morning. But one elementary school just sent out a letter informing the parents that the school is welcoming a new family with a transgender “3rd grade girl.” The letter urges the parents and students to welcome and accept her and treat her the same as any other girl. Not so subtly, the letter also informed parents that the school district does not tolerate discrimination in respect to gender identity and/or expression, sexual orientation, ethnicity, disability or religion. YIKES!!! My heart absolutely…
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Shoe Box Christians
Am I rushing things to ask you to think about Thanksgiving in September? Maybe. But, please hear me out. What characterizes the Christian life more than that of giving thanks? We do a lot of activities ahead of time during advent and lent to prepare for Christmas and Easter. What do we do ahead to prepare for Thanksgiving Day? What is a Thanksgiving Day without giving of thanks? It can easily be forgotten in the midst of the food and fun. Be intentional this year, Take advantage of the next nine weeks to prepare. If you are home schooling, teaching Sunday School, or just plain parenting this will be an activity…
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Lies We Tell Our Children
I feel very reluctant to write about any parenting issue, because I was and am such an incredibly flawed parent. Nevertheless, I have learned things over the years that I am trying to put into practice during what remains of my parenting years. I’d like to share some of those things with you in the hope that you may find a glimmer of something practical that you could incorporate into your parenting. It goes without saying that building into our kids spiritually is one of the biggest jobs we have as parents and perhaps one area where we may feel unsure. I’m not going to address that important area directly,…
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The Guilt Game
My friend worked on the apples while I peeled and chopped bananas for the fruit salad. I admired Lauri’s ability to organize this missions breakfast for a large church: recruiting lots of people to bring food, providing some of the food herself, hosting me in her home, caring for three children, and all the while struggling with chronic pain and physical limitations. As I contemplated all she did, I began to feel inadequate. I could never do something like this,” I lamented in my head. “I must be hopelessly disorganized. My friend seems to do this effortlessly, in spite of all the other demands on her life and energy. How…
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“Free Speech for Me, But Not for Thee” Zone
Wow, today was a big news day for free speech. College campuses are up in arms as students demand they be guaranteed “safe zones” where they can be protected from hearing ideas that they don’t like but openly criticize anyone with ideas that don’t match their own. Let’s see, last time I looked, if you are only fed one set of ideas day and night, isn’t that brainwashing? Isn’t that what cults do to capture the minds of their initiates? When did we stop teaching our children to embrace the process of evaluating and thinking through ideas to their logical conclusion? I don’t necessarily like listening to someone with ideas…
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What I Wish I’d Heard Growing Up
I have the privilege of helping to moderate an online forum for women who struggle with same-sex attraction. One of the things that all the people in this ministry share is a history of hurtful relationships with their families, especially their same-sex parent.
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Only Strong and Courageous
I cried when I hugged my daughter goodbye on the parking lot across the street from the dorm where she now lives. I didn’t care. I knew that moment would unleash the emotions I had bottled up all summer long. So I released it right there. Up to this point, I had watched my student take charge of her college checklist. I helped her unpack and I watched her settle into her new “home.” Honestly, it all felt so wrong but I knew in my heart God wanted this. So when I hugged her one last time, God said, “Let her go.” And I did…
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When the “Sweet Spot” of Parenting Ends: 6 Tips for Surviving Your Kids’ Milestones
For a couple of years I've enjoyed the so-called "sweet spot" of parenting: each child between the age of 14 and 5, still at home they are all mostly self-sufficient (no more diapers!) and helpful around the house their unique personalities are emerging and developing they like to talk to me! they get my jokes and even the youngest now (5) can instigate his own the oldest was old, and responsible, enough to babysit so mom and dad could go out on occasional dates (!!) Did I mention they were all still at home? Because that is about to change. Sometimes change thrills me, and sometimes I want to punch it in…
