A Word To The Wise
Sunday School Chronicles Me: Before we get to Rehoboam, lemme tell y’all about his daddy. Solomon was a rolling stone. This dude had 700 wives and 300 girlfriends. Kids: What!?!?!?!? Me: Yes! Put 700 and 300 together. What do you get? Kids: 1000! Me: Yup! Solomon had 1000 random chicks in his life. Girls, let’s be real, can we be extra? Boy: Yes-suh!!!!! Me: Wow. That was passionate. Who hurt you? So Solomon has a bunch women in his life plus he’s considered the wisest man in the world. Kids: What??? Me: This proves wise people do dumb stuff. Solomon had a bunch of kids including Rehoboam. Can you imagine…
God The Tester
Sunday School Chronicles Me: So, Jesus has fasted for 40 days and 40 nights in preparation for the pre battle royale with Satan. Satan comes out all big and bad ready to tempt Jesus. What does it mean to tempt? Student 1: It’s when someone tries to convince you to do something you’re not supposed to do. Me: I like that. What does it mean to test? Student 2: When your parent leaves the cookie jar out and tells you not to eat a cookie before dinner. Me: You’re close! Why do you get tests at school? Student 1: Because they want to see how we’re doing. Me: Exactly! God…
You Can’t Lose His Love
Sunday School Chronicles Me: Is there anything you can do to make your parents not love you?Kids: (without hesitation) No.Me: Ok cool. Do you think there are people out there who think their parents would stop loving them?Kid 1: Yeah. I think there’s people out there who think that.Me: Can you do anything that would make God not love you anymore?Kids: (zero hesitation) No!Me: Exactly! There is absolutely nothing you can do to separate you from God’s love. Nothing. But there are people who don’t believe this. Some people belive that since they have sucky parents, then God must suck, too. Good or bad, people think God is just like…
Spiderman with a Heart for God
Sunday School Chronicles Me: Any of y’all got older siblings? Kids: *multiple hands fly up* Yes! Me: Do they ever treat you like your voice doesn’t matter? Kids: Ugh!!!! Yeah! Me: I get it! I’m the baby too and it sucks. I’m sorry to tell you this. You will always be the baby. Let me tell y’all about the most powerful baby out there. King David was the baby just like you. But let’s start with his pre-king days. Saul is the current king. He’s trash. “Sin” is his first, middle, and last name. He sins for fun, when he’s hungry, and sins before bed. So God is like, “First…
For God So Loved His Faves
Sunday School Chronicles Me: Is favoritism a good thing or a bad thing? Kids: Bad! Me: Why? Kid 1: Because other people will feel bad. Kid 2: They’ll feel jealous. Kid 3: They’ll be mad. Me: Yes! All of that! Did you know the Bible talks about favoritism? Kids: No. Me: It does! Let’s say you’re throwing a party. Two dudes walk in. One is dripped out in every brand name singers talk about. Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and Prada. And the other one walks in rocking Tar-zhey. Kids: Tar-zhey???? Kid 4: You mean Target? Me: I said what I said. So you sit the brand named dude at the head…
Love Your Enemies
A 5th Grade Sunday School Class learns that Captain America, Bucky, and God have a lot more in common than they originally thought.
The Power of the Tongue
A 5th Grade Sunday School Class learns about the power of the tongue.
A 5th Grade Sunday School Class learns about Saul and following the crowd.
A One God Army
A 5th Grade Sunday School Class learns about Gideon's army and trusting God.
Jesus: The Sin Doctor
A 5th Grade Sunday School Class talks about the perfect prescription for sin.